Forever Health and Fitness
Until you fucking die spells forever. As you tear away the calendar pages of your life, not one of those tears will you not have to take care of this meat puppet suit you can’t ever take off. For the rest of your life month after month year after year you will have to be conscious of what you put in your world hole, exercise for god sakes, get some sleep, and manage that stress that aging the shit out of your body. Long after you’re 3 month onesie win some cash that you’ll spend on something idiotic challenge, fit booty whatever the shit camp, and blow it out your ass detox liquid enema bullshit extravaganza, you’re still going to have to do the same basic boring shit that’s kept us alive for all these years forever until you die. And you’ll have to do that shit without anyone blue thumbs upping your food pics and sit ups on the washing machine (ooh noooo!!) or giving a shit at all. I hope you’re cool with that champ. Because the second you think your 2 months at the gym resolution in the new year is gonna get your body right and it’s going to stay that way without you keeping that shit up, you got two smoking middle fingers coming your way that your body well deliver to you on a daily basis in the form of weight gain, stress, and hospital bills. So if you start this shit you better be in it for the long haul. You better sign up for workout classes that has an end date with an 8 on it side and you better be putting things in your mouth that you think are delicious until they put you in that cheap ass Burlington coat factory suit as they lay your dead ass in a box, otherwise you got some disappointment coming. FOREVER. That’s how long you gotta do this shit for. Having a cream filled day.